They Have a Season

smartslut8907 @ 2007-01-14T21:33:00

2007-01-15T02:33:04Z

A Streetcar Named Desire: Language Analysis

Speech One:

Blanche: I, I, I took the blows in my face and my body! All of those deaths! The long parade to the graveyard! Father, mother! Margaret, that dreadful way! So big with it, it couldn’t be put in a coffin! But had to be burned like rubbish! You just came home in time for the funerals, Stella. And funerals are pretty compared to deaths. Funerals are quiet, but deaths – not always. Sometimes their breathing is hoarse, and sometimes it rattles, and sometimes they even cry out to you, “Don’t let me go!” Even the old, sometimes, say, “Don’t let me go.” As if you were able to stop them! But funerals are quiet, with pretty flowers. And, oh, what gorgeous boxes they pack them away in! Unless you were there at the bed when they cried out, “Hold me!” you’d never suspect there was the struggle for breath and bleeding. You didn’t dream, but I saw! Saw! Saw! And now you sit there telling me with your eyes that I let the place go! How in hell do you think all that sickness and dying was paid for? Death is expensive, Miss Stella! And old Cousin Jessie’s right after Margaret’s, hers! Why, the Grim Reaper had put up his tent on our doorstep! . . . Stella. Belle Reve was his headquarters! Honey – that’s how it slipped through my fingers! Which of them left us a fortune? Which of them left a cent of insurance even? Only poor Jessie – one hundred to pay for her coffin. That was all, Stella! And I with my pitiful salary at the school. Yes, accuse me! Sit there and stare at me, thinking I let the place go! I let the place go? Where were you! In bed with your – Polack! (Scene 1)

I. Meaning
a. It is in this speech that Blanche reveals her motives for coming to stay with her sister. Blanche explains that their childhood estate was lost, due to financial ruin. Feeling insecure about the part she played in the loss of her home, Blanche feels it necessary to turn the blame around on Stella.
II. Importance
a. Themes
b. Characters
i. Blanche: Blanche’s breakdown here diverges from her confident manner when speaking to others. This gives the reader insight into her broken psyche, having witnessed and experiences events that others would hardly dare to speak of. It also contrasts with the manner in which Blanche describes the loss to Belle Reve to Stanley, taking a much more casual tone with it in Scene Two.
III. Diction
a. Slur: The term “Polack” is used by Blanche to describe Stanley. Primarily, this characterizes Blanche as arrogant, thinking herself as high-class and proper while belittling her brother-in-law based on his background. This also serves a secondary purpose of characterizing Stanley. “Polack” is a crude term, which truly does embody Stanley’s personality. He is unrefined, vulgar, and cruel, much like the slur itself.
IV. Syntax
a. Broken sentence structure: This first examines the broken structure Blanche often speaks with. Many of her sentences are fragments, incomplete or interrupted with punctuation. The unevenness of her speech is telling of the unevenness of her mind, displaying her fragile state and foreshadowing her eventual breakdown.
b. Repetition: “I, I, I…”; “…saw! Saw! Saw!” Blanche has been further broken down by her experiences at Belle Reve (having been first scarred by her husband) and feels attacked by her sister. In an effort to defend her previous, and failed, efforts to maintain the estate, Blanche uses this repetition to emphasize that she was there to defend and there to see the horrible pain, while her sister was noticeably absent.
V. Figurative Language
a. Personification of death in the Grim Reaper: This underscores the overwhelming presence of death at Belle Reve. Blanche was haunted and tormented with the loss and pain she witnessed, feeling as though death was a vengeful entity that was purposefully stalking her.

Speech Two:

Blanche: He acts like an animal, has an animal’s habits! Eats like one, moves like one, talks like one! There’s even something – sub-human – something not quite to the stage of humanity yet! Yes, something – ape-like about him, like one of those pictures I’ve seen in – anthropological studies! Thousands and thousands of years have passed him right by, and there he is – Stanley Kowalski – survivor of the stone age! Bearing the raw meat home from the kill in the jungle! And you – you here – waiting for him! Maybe he’ll strike you or maybe grunt and kiss you! That is, if kisses have been discovered yet! Night falls and the other apes gather! There in front of the cave, all grunting like him, and swilling and gnawing and hulking! His poker night! – you call it – this party of apes! Somebody growls – some creature snatches at something – the fight is on! God! Maybe we are a long way from being made in God’s image, but Stella – my sister – there has been some progress since then! Such things as art – as poetry and music – such kinds of new light have come into the world since then! In some kinds of people some tenderer feelings have had some little beginning! That we have got to make grow! And cling to, and hold as our flag! In this dark march toward whatever it is we’re approaching. . . . Don’t – don’t hang back with the brutes! (Scene 4)

I. Meaning: Blanche is shaken after witnessing the spousal abuse of her sister by Stanley. While Stella is eager to defend and romanticize the actions of her husband, Blanche, seeing the reality of the situation, desperately attempts to persuade her sister that Stanley is vicious. She expresses her shock and disbelief that Stella continues to put up with Stanley’s primitive and cruel excuses for affection.
II. Importance
a. Themes
b. Characters
III. Diction
IV. Syntax
V. Figurative Language
a. Similes comparing Stanley to an animal: “…acts like an animal...”; “Eats like one, moves like one, talks like one!”
b. Hyperbole: “Thousands and thousands of years have passed him right by…” Blanche utilizes this device to convey Stanley’s brutishness and primitiveness. Essentially, it embodies all that is Stanley, communicating in short, simple sentences, and using women primarily to satisfy his sexual needs.
c. Metaphor: “…the other apes gather!” The attitude that Blanche shows towards men in this play is that of mistrust and condescendence. Having been previously betrayed, Blanche truly only views men as animals with animal desires.

Speech Three:

Blanche: He was a boy, just a boy, when I was a very young girl. When I was sixteen, I made the discovery – love. All at once and much, much too completely. It was like you suddenly turned a blinding light on something that had always been half in shadow, that’s how it struck the world for me. But I was unlucky. Deluded. There was something different about the boy, a nervousness, a softness and tenderness which wasn’t like a man’s, although he wasn’t the least bit effeminate looking- still- -that thing was there. . . . He came to me for help. I didn’t know that. I didn’t find out anything till after our marriage when we’d run away and come back and all I knew was I’d failed him in some mysterious way and wasn’t able to give the help he needed but couldn’t speak of! He was in the quicksands and clutching at me- -but I wasn’t holding him out, I was slipping in with him! I didn’t know that. I didn’t know anything except that I loved him unendurably but without being able to help him or help myself. Then I found out. In the worst of all possible ways. By coming suddenly into a room that I thought was empty- -which wasn’t empty, but had two people in it. . . the boy I had married and an older man who had been his friend for years. . . .

Afterwards, we pretended that nothing had been discovered. Yes, the three of us drove out to Moon Lake Casino, very drunk and laughing all the way.

We danced the Varsouviana! Suddenly, in the middle of the dance the boy I had married broke away from me and ran out of the casino. A few moments later – a shot!

I ran out – all did! – all ran and gathered about the terrible thing at the edge of the lake! I couldn’t get near for the crowding. Then somebody caught my arm. “Don’t go any closer! Come back! You don’t want to see!” See? See what! Then I heard voices say – Allan! Allan! The Grey boy! He’d stuck the revolver into his mouth, and fired – so that the back of his head had been – blown away!

It was because – on the dance floor – unable to stop myself – I’d suddenly said – “I saw! I know! You disgust me. . .” And then the searchlight which had been turned on the world was turned off again and never for one moment since has there been any light that’s stronger than this – kitchen – candle. . .(Scene 6)

I. Meaning: Blanche, desperate for the affection and joy that she felt so briefly before, reveals her past to Mitch in order to get closer to him. She discusses her past marriage as a young girl. Mentioning the noticeable difference between the boy she took as her husband and other men, Blanche subtly discloses the shocking revelation of her husband’s homosexuality, and also his eventual suicide. As she speaks of it, she repeats several times that he was using her to help him, so that she could act as a cure of some sort to his problem. She regretfully admits that she was unaware of his cries for help, and failed him by not giving him the help and solace that he was in need of.
II. Importance
a. Themes
i. Loss of Innocence: As Blanche discusses her love, she romanticizes the feelings that she once felt for Allan. Emphasizing their youth, she repeatedly refers to him as “the boy,” which itself evokes an image of innocence and naiveté. After seeing her husband, whom she has linked to newfound feelings of love and joy, in bed with another man, it is apparent that the romanticism and purity of Blanche has died.
ii. Sex replaces love: Much like in the relationship of Stanley and Stella, Blanche’s love is seemingly replaces, or, more accurately, destroyed, by sex. The effect that love had on her world, the searchlight, is extinguished by the sight of her husband and his lover.
b. Characters
i. Blanche: In this speech, the reason for Blanche’s fragility is finally revealed. Her past turmoil has only been briefly referred to up until this point. The traumatizing event of seeing her first great love with another man accounts for the mixture of guardedness and brokenness that Blanche has displayed thus far.
III. Diction
IV. Syntax
a. Parallel Structure: “I didn’t know that. I didn’t…anything…” Blanche repeats this phrase to emphasize her ignorance of her husband’s trouble. Through her words and her tone, it is apparent that she feels largely responsible for the manner in which the marriage ended. She justifies her actions and failure by repeating that she was unaware, that she “didn’t know.”
b. Broken Structure: Again, Blanche’s mental state is apparent through her syntax. She is once again breaking down as she recalls the past strife, and her speech reflects the broken state of her mind. Sentences are fragmented and interrupted with dashes.
V. Figurative Language
a. Simile: “It was like you suddenly turned a blinding light on something that had always been half in shadow…” To Blanche, the discovery of love changes her perception of the world.
b. Conceit: “…the searchlight which had been turned on the world had been turned off again…” Blanche’s continued use of the light to describe love expresses the heartbreak and pain that Allan caused her. Much like the distinct difference between looking at an object in the light compared to in the dark, Blanche’s experience with love and the world since has never quite come close to how she felt so briefly when she was young.

Speech Four:

Blanche: Yes, a big spider! That’s where I brought my victims. Yes, I had many intimacies with strangers. After the death of Allan – intimacies with strangers was all I seemed able to fill my empty heart with. . . . I think it was panic, just panic, that drove me from one to another, hunting for some protection – here and there, in the most – unlikely places – even, at last, in a seventeen-year old boy but – somebody wrote the superintendent about it – “This woman is morally unfit for her position!”
True? Yes, I suppose – unfit somehow – anyway. . . . So I came here. There was nowhere else I could go. I was played out. You know what played out is? My youth was suddenly gone up the water-spout, and – I met you. You said you needed somebody. Well, I needed somebody, too. I thanked God for you, because you seemed to be gentle – a cleft in the rock of the world that I could hide in! But I guess I was asking, hoping – too much! Kiefaber, Stanley and Shaw have tied an old tin can to the tail of the kite. (Scene 9)

I. Meaning:
II. Importance
a. Themes
i. Sex replaces Love: “After the death of Allan – intimacies with strangers was all I seemed able to fill my empty heart with…” Blanche can fill the void left by her lost love with sexual encounters. Many characters throughout this play exhibit this tendency to settle for intimacy through sex in place of intimacy through love and affection.
ii. Loss of Innocence
b. Characters
III. Diction
IV. Syntax
V. Figurative Language
a. Metaphor: Blanche likens herself to a spider.

Speech Five:

Blanche: I can smell the sea air. The rest of my time I’m going to spend on the sea. And when I die, I’m going to die on the sea. You know what I shall die of? I shall die of eating an unwashed grape one day out on the ocean. I will die – with my hand in the hand of some nice-looking ship’s doctor, a very young one with a small blond mustache and a big silver watch. “Poor lady,” they’ll say, “the quinine did her no good. That unwashed grape has transported her soul to heaven.” And I’ll be buried at sea sewn up in a clean white sack and dropped overboard – at noon – in the blaze of summer – and into an ocean as blue as my first lover’s eyes! (Scene 11)

I. Meaning
II. Importance
III. Diction
IV. Syntax
V. Figurative Language

Sabrina

2006-01-08T04:47:41Z

So anyway, I saw Wicked tonight at the Kennedy Center. That shit was amazing! Although any script written by the creator of "my So-called Life" is bound to be good.

Hehe, what made me laugh were two things:

- One: Nessarose was played by Libby from Sabrina the Teenage Witch

- Two: My brother and I played a game of spotting the gay men couples in the audience before the show started.

There are a lot of old gay men in the world!

So anyway, that was my night.

Luvya!

Best fortune cookie ever

2005-12-26T03:42:50Z

"Maybe in the next century you will live on the moon"

Those wacky asians ;)

So anyway it's christmas. Merry stuff and such. I'm watching Saved right now to get into the spirit of jesus. Went bowling with jews this afternoon. You know, just your typical christmas.

This winter break is much needed. Sleep to be had by all.

Luvya

what the fuck is wrong with the world?

2005-12-17T02:40:57Z

I don't even know what to say...

I just thought that after twelve angry jurors, I wouldn't have to deal with this sort of thing again.

First of all, my predictions were off. Even though they really shouldn't have been.

To give a major lead to a freshman....who could not sing to save his life (in actuality his singing would probably kill others)...is...disgusting.

I have absolutely no respect for ms. Bradley anymore. And I already had no respect for Ms. Searle. I knew my talking back to that woman would come back to bite me in the ass. I just thought she wouldn't be THAT stupid. Should've seen it coming.

My part, by the way, doesn't have any solos. He sings twice with two other guys. Word has yet to come back on how many lines he has.

I was gonnna quit, but katie is making me stay in the show cuz it's her first. But i'm not going to be quiet about this.

Predictions, just cuz I'm a ho like that

2005-12-15T01:13:22Z

Ariel - Laura Moore

Ren - Joey

Willard - Jayme

Rusty - Hannah

Reverend - Ben

His wife -Lia

Ren's Mom - Sara (unless she sings)

Wendy Jo - Azah

Urline - That new girl brooke

Chuck - Me (by default)

And that's all the parts I can remember at the moment. Hmmmm...

I know everyone who reads this cares a lot ;-) Actually, I just want documentation jic I'm right.

PSAT results came back

2005-12-13T19:44:05Z

2240!!! 99th percentile

And then the lion ate Ms. Savini's face

2005-12-10T03:52:51Z

Snow day today. 11 hours of sleep

I'm tired.

The white witch from the Narnia movie looks like Ms. Savini. Hilarity ensues

I don't want to go to set work. The prospect of a saturday morning with Randi is too depressing to contemplate.

Auditions start on Monday. Isn't that just dandy?

Can I go to sleep now?

Alexis Bledel has a weird body

2005-11-23T01:10:56Z

I feel like I'm neglecting this thing now that I've got a myspace...oh well

So anyway, how is everyone? Ya'll good?

I think that's all I got...

I've just begun to realize that Alexis Bledel has a really weird shaped body, like huge hips that don't fit with her legs, and a really thin upper torso. Well good on her for making it into showbiz anyway.

I wanna see Rent with friends, but my dad is taking me out of town for the entire weekend. How rude is that? It's not even to see family.

I like cake. And ER. But not overbearing jewish guys...

Murder...and a bit of cockney

2005-11-11T02:45:09Z

So my review of QO's show got into today's post!!!!! I was so excited this morning, there was no extent to my jubilation. Except they kind of got a little edit happy, and switched some information around to make it wrong, but the point is, yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I got straight A's on my report card today!

Today is mine.

THIS MAKES MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2005-10-27T23:39:49Z

I had a 89.9 in BC calculus, and we had a giant test today that would be our last grade of the marking period. Checked my grade.

91 on the test! Final grade 90.2%!!!!

A in BC Calculus bitches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jocularity

2005-10-13T02:18:01Z

PSAT today. I got a small thrill in the writing section when I read every single sentence, and realized exactly what was wrong with it, then realized what they threw in to throw us off. Ms. Savini's INGs were in my head!!! Everything she taught us was in the reading section. Damn you, Maxine Hong Kingston!

Predictions:

Math- 710
Writing- 730
Critical Reading- 580

I guess we'll find out in december...

So anyway, It's yom kippur. The service actually didn't seem that unbearably long. I guess it's just cuz I've spent 3 hours in boating class taught by senior citizens. Nothing can phase me anymore!!!

And now all I have to deal with is the not eating for a day. Darn, that was so much easier when I was anorexic.

Luvya!!!

Pablo Honey

2005-10-01T23:00:01Z

Anomale is not a very big word...unless you're a model

So anyway, I got a 93 on the Calc test, meaning for at least two hours on Friday, I had straight A's. Well, it's nice to see that my junior year isn't being marked in the complete breakdown of my gpa...yet....

I feel soooooo old. I threw off my back lifting a box yesterday, so now it's completely fucked up. Oh well.

Meanwhile, we were getting fitted for costumes yesterday, and the first dress Laura tried on was the one I wore for one acts. Awkward that I fit into a dress that a GIRL half a foot shorter than me fits into. Hopefully, I've gotten slightly bigger since then.

I laughed til my head came off, women and children first, women and children first.

Going insane is fun, but doing it in front of the world is entertaining.

So the choir trip this year is to Disney World. Is it sad that the only thought in my head for the first five minutes was, "I'm gonna be missing two days of school...that's a lot of work to make up..."?

And I have nothing left to say

Luvya.

Studying is a skill

2005-09-29T02:19:10Z

So anyway, I am so completely out of it right now...and it can only go downhill as the year goes on...

I have a giant Calc Test tomorrow. I was so excited when I checked my grade today,and I was like "I'm up to 88!!!.....That's not gonna last til Friday though..." Well, whatcha gonna do? I tried studying with Tiffany today at the library, but we could only get through four concepts before we gave up and came to the conclusion that no matter how hard we studied, we know everything pretty much as well as we are going to.

Meanwhile, I swear the librarian in Germantown looks just like this woman I'm related to in some obscure way...but she's NOT!

So anyway, I gave in to peer pressure and the stupid notion that colleges like extracurricular activities, and I applies to be in the stupid SGA cabinet. It felt so poignant as I was writing something to the effect of "being part of the decision making process that will affect my fellow students and my school is a privelege that I would not take for granted...it is important to me to leave my mark on Seneca, and to help improve the high school experience for my peers" while wearing my new shirt, reading "I make stuff up."

You know, once you get into the habit of using an accent, it never leaves you! I keep ending my sentences Irishly. It's pissing me off.

It is getting harder and harder to get 7 hours of sleep...

Well, back to semi-studying.

Luvya!

Hit Me Up

2005-09-25T04:38:35Z

When did that become a phrase?

SO anyway, I am updating less and less, and then I realized, that is unfair to my legion of fans who tune in daily, hoping for an update in my livejournal, to get some small thrill, or in other words, Hannah's youth pastor.

I am so excited!!! I am going to see Wicked at the Kennedy Center on January 7th.

And apparently short jewish guys in DC think I'm hot.

And I have a B in Calculus! I just hope it lasts....

I'll always remember that summer of 1936...It was the summer Aunt Maggie made me into a man.

Luvya!

Play my Member

2005-09-15T01:31:57Z

I know what you're thinking....and it's DIRTY.

So anywho, today was a fairly lovely day for the rosenfeld clan. I realized that the stress and annoyance of being in Ms. Wideman's class can be offset by the fact that, hey, I'm smart and should be in AP anyway. Thus, I anser all of her questions in the much desired level four response, and earn myself extra points to ensure my success.

Following this, of course, was the lovely little reading comprehension thing in English:

To alter something is to: a) kill b) breathe c) change d) stop

If only I knew the answer...

And to top of my lovely hump-day, I was called to be informed that I got Michael in Dancing at Lughnasa, which is the main character, even though no one, including me, really wanted him anyway, cuz he is onstage the entire time and has a plethora (ooh, SAT word) of monologues that run about a page each. Then I realized: I'll memorize the entire play anyway, and plus, I'M THE FRIGGIN MAIN CHARACTER!!! THAT IS SO AWESOME!!!

So yeah, that was my day...

Oh yeah, I almost forgot

ME: No offense Hannah, but your youth pastor seems kind of child-molestor-y

(Hannah argues with me for a couple of minutes about how that isn't funny)

Hannah: John wants to grow up to be a child molestor --- I mean youth pastor

(uninterrupted laughter from me for five minutes, spliced with Hannah arguing about how that's not funny)

All I can say is, Freudian slips are how you really feel...

Luvya!

ALL I HAVE TO SAY

2005-09-12T18:41:12Z

"I just want to squirt a cow's milk into my mouth"

Some people just realy like fresh milk i suppose.

Meanwhile, Ms. Savini doesn't like me that much because Jordan was her savior, but that is to be expected.

All I have to say is, all of my worries about the spring musical are gone. Imagine for a moment that Keith drank a lot of milk, ate candy, screamed for an hour straight, then got bronchitis. The result is Garrett's voice...

Luvya!!!

The Stuff

2005-09-08T00:31:00Z

Watched Reefer Madness the Musical last night. Now apparently Romeo and Juliet got married and had six children. Guess someone ripped out the last few pages of the copy I got in ninth grade.

"Someone make sure that Garrett gets his cd, so he can practice for Take on Me, cuz i wanna give the entire song to him and have his children even though he's a freshman and I'm a frigid bitch."

I'm not bitter. I swear. ;)

Don't hold it against me. I've had a long day.

So anyway, Christian Campbell is one sexy man.

And I desperately need coffee.

So how are you?

Luvya!

Marquee Mark

2005-09-03T02:24:58Z

Look what I just learned how to do

Scott Foster Rosenfeld

So anyway, my school picture turned out awesome!!! The best in at least six years.

And I think a girl hit on me last night. Laugh if you must, but I actually came off, dare I say, straight. Something about me being more reserved and having a deeper voice when I talk to people I don't know. Fun.

Luvya!

AHA!

2005-08-29T23:49:17Z

Well thus ends the the first day of school. And past this point lies all my optimism about 11th grade

*end*

So I'm semi-stressed out. Between Ms. Weiner's and Ms. Savini's constant references to how common it is for students to get C s and D s in their classes, Ms. Savini's explanation to why she calls them "multches," Ms. Wideman's assertion that there will, in fact, be a test everyday, as well as her constant use of the phrase "up in this piece," I am freakin out!!! ;)

Meanwhile, I would very much like to tell you about the last minute addition to chamber choir, Garrett, I believe his name was. What was it that Ms. Searle called him? Ah, yes. ERIK IN TRAINING. And he's actually a tenor. I did not work this hard for two years just to have a lead in the musical stolen from someone younger than me...although come to think of it, I kind of did that to Jayme last year. But it's not the same!!! Cuz this time it's me. Hehe.

Meanwhile, Mia's not in choir. And I'm a tenor two. And there are actually more guys than girls. Huh?

Luvya!

Edit: OMG!!! I just found this, it's hilarious!!!

scoforo [8:26 PM]: stet
scoforo [8:26 PM]: u have 6 smiles
scoforo [8:26 PM]: one when u're talking with friends
scoforo [8:26 PM]: one when ur nervous
scoforo [8:27 PM]: one when u fall down by accident
scoforo [8:27 PM]: one when u get an a
scoforo [8:27 PM]: one when u talk about sex
scoforo [8:27 PM]: one when u have sex
scoforo [8:27 PM]: and one when u have sex with me

I don't feel like doing an entire survey, so I'll skip to the part I like

2005-08-28T23:17:40Z

Seven songs people should listen to: (no particular order, they all rock)
1. We belong -Pat Benatar (choir version sooooo not the same)
2. Breathe Me -Sia
3. Full of Grace -Sarah Mclachlan
4. Volcano -Damien Rice
5. Do you Realize -Flaming Lips
6. I'll Stand by You -The pretenders
7. Strong Enough -Sheryl Crow

Seven favorite movies:
1. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
2. Little Nemo (NOT Finding Nemo, LITTLE Nemo)
3. Finding Neverland
4. Pieces Of April (Or at least it was before Katie Holmes let me down like that)
5. Mean Girls
6. Notting Hill
7. Garden State

and just cuz I want to...

Seven Books people should read:
1. High Fidelity -Nick Hornby
2. Wuthering Heights -Emily Bronte
3. The hunchback of Notre Dame- Victor Hugo
4. The Lorax -DR. Seuss
5. Chronicles of Narnia -CS Lewis
6. Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil -John Berendt
7. Sideways Stories from Wayside School -Louis Sachar

So summer is over, although for a lot of people who read this, they're in college, so it already ended. Ugh, I don't want to go back to school tomorrow. Waking up at six kills me slowly. Plus, I'm not done with my homework yet. Fun times.

Meanwhile, I'm watching the MTV awards pre show. God, John Norris is dressed like a fag. What straight man wears a lilac tanktop with rhinestones on it?

Luvya

In business

2005-08-22T00:13:53Z

Well i just realized i haven't updated since July, and I also realized I have nothing better to do, so here you go.

I've spent the last week in driving school with Alicia, Stet, Hannah, and Preeya. It's fairly interesting, better than my brother said it would be, mainly because my instructor is just past senile. He was born in 1933 and somehow believes himself to be 70 years old, is fairly hard of hearing, and manages to include twenty minute lectures on how flamingos escape being eaten by baboons in the curriculum. Plus, he always lets us out twenty minutes early. Ah, the fun of driving school.

Meanwhile, school starts in a week, and I can't motivate myself to begin writing paragraph one of twenty for english. I also have modern world, should complete 7 more hours of driving in august to have any hope of getting my license before my learner's expires, i have 15 more hours of driving school, and am in desperate need of a haircut. No worries ;). Other people have lots more to get done.

Now back to the law and order svu marathon.

Luvya!

Pope Benedict

2005-07-26T01:18:24Z

I gave up on the traditional Maryland pastime of ripping apart crab carcasses in search of the tiny, yet delicious, scraps of meat when I was a child. The crab's eyes were always looking at me. It was as if it was glaring at me, as if to say, "You couldn't have gotten the salmon? Fish don't feel pain. They put me in boiling water while I was STILL ALIVE!" Then there was the process itself. I would cut myself on the the sharper parts of the crab's shell (does the term "natural defense mechanism" mean something to anyone?), then carterize the wound with the mounds of old bay seasoning that caked the animal. I never liked leaving dinner with burning pain in my hands.

Always been a crab cake kind of man myself...

Meanwhile, my cd player broke this weekend. Man, I got that for my bar mitzvah.

Master and a half

2005-07-13T21:39:02Z

My dad has been home for an hour and already he's in a pissy mood.

It was such a pleasant week...I guess time flies when you're glad your dad is on another continent.

Luvya.

Edit: Fun news tho. In israel, my dad met Courtney Thorne Smith, from Melrose Place, Ally Mcbeal, and According to Jim.

Basin

2005-07-12T00:00:18Z

Well, as most of you know already, I am back in town. Although I got here like a week ago, so I don't know why that's supposed to be news. Never updated though. Just lazy.

I have employed my brother in the task of unskinny-fying me. Meaning: I have to eat like a normal person, if not more, and lift weights almost everyday. Result: My stomach constantly hurts now, since I have not eaten to the point of being full for at least 2 years, and I can't bend. Someone tell me how the hell leg workouts make my lower back sore.

Ah fun summer memories.

Call me if any of you get bored.

Luvya.

The empire strikes back

2005-07-02T13:58:53Z

Hmm...it seems that I update more now that I don't have free internet than i did when i did. I guess i just enjoy pissing people off like that.

So i am now in eilat, which creepily resembles ocean ciy in maryland, except there are a lot of signs in hebrew, and also no one is afraid of wearing a speedo. And it never seems to be the attractive ppl either.

Since we have talked last I have visted all seas that rhyme with ed, which led to an odd incident involving a naked guy in the shower at the dead sea. Shudder.

The entire trip thus far has remembled a history lesson, which kinda sux becase jewish history is mildly depressing. We are finally rid of our guide though, so that is thankfully over. I feel kind of bad for hating our guide so much. It's nothing that he actually did, it's just a mixture of the excursions he took us on and a resemblance to the emperor from star wars.

Now i must go tho, i will have a somewhat more extended description for thos who care when i get back hom, as i have less than two minutes left of paid internet time.

luvya